I am more reluctant to judge others. One, I'm not my stepdaughters' mom, and if I were, I don't think I'd be too happy if they had a stepmother writing about their lives on her blog. Even if their biological mother rarely sees them. Which brings us to number three. Even if they CALL you mom.
And who wants to write about that? I am a far better wife and mother than I would have been without my stepdaughters. To be fair, things started out great. I am gentler with myself. My stepdaughters and I got along right away from the moment we met, and the first two years of blended family-dom were pretty awesome. Ultimately, zealously protecting your marriage benefits everyone -- your stepchildren need to see you and your husband stay together and fight for your relationship, even when times are tough.
So many issues a blended family faces come from the divorce, which the stepmother (hopefully) had nothing to do with. I've had several big reasons to steer clear of the topic. And then all hell breaks loose. This is simply what I have learned from my experience.
Protect your marriage at all costs. Embrace it, and make the most of it. Divorce is one of the most devastating things a person will ever go through, and no one needs to hear from you how the ex-wife is handling it, or how her kids are acting out in the aftermath. We all have the potential to be amazing. Stick with it and know that you will emerge from this a better person. I would change a lot of things I did as a stepmother if I could go back in time, but I wouldn't give up my blended family.
We are all messed up, but you know what? So let's start with ten brutal truths I've learned in my eleven years (and counting) as a stepmom, truths that every new stepmom, or woman even thinking of becoming a stepmom should consider. Realistically, you're probably ALL partially to blame for the problems in your relationships. Today, time and counseling have given me some much-needed perspective, and now that my older girls very nearly on their own, I feel ready to write more about the subject on my blog -- which is good, I guess, because I get a lot of e-mails from stepmoms asking for advice. If childrearing issues are pulling you apart, pinpoint exactly what's hurting your marriage and protect your relationship in this area immediately and relentlessly. Do not make the mistake of believing in your heart that you have all the same rights and privileges as the woman who gave birth to them, because you don't. My husband and I didn't visit a counselor until we'd been married eight years, which was a huge mistake.
Do you know that I hear your exact same problems from nearly every blended family that comes in this room? You can have a meaningful, loving, influential relationship with your stepchildren, but it will be different from that between a mother and child. Also on The Huffington Post: Now that I have raised my stepdaughters and had time to look back on the experience, I feel like I ran a gauntlet of tremendous emotional challenges and came across the finish line truly changed. Or maybe you think your marital problems are all your stepkids' fault. We are all working toward that potential, in our own time and in our own way. You may agree -- you may disagree. That's theirs to tell, if they choose. I really, really, really needed to hear that. YOU'RE DOING GREAT! " Four, and this was a biggie, I often felt like the world's worst stepmother. Or their 'Bonus Mom, ' for that matter.
I'm not their mom, and acting like I was probably caused some resentment and confusion on both ends. Over and over and over again. Somehow, we all muddled through adolescence and made it through to the other side. You are not their mother. We are learning more about each other as we go. And the experience actually ended up being a huge bonding point for my husband and me. You've almost made it through! We live in a world where everyone loves to vent, whether it's on Facebook, over the phone, or during a girls night out, but take it from me -- no one likes to hear a stepmother vent about her husband's ex or her stepkids. Silence is the best policy. As wonderful as I'm sure you are, you can't fix that. But know up front that I am going to limit this subject and its details to MY story, not the story of my stepdaughters or their mother. More than 70% of blended family marriages fail. I now believe that a good stepmom is physically/emotionally available when her stepkids need and want her to be, and she backs off and becomes a behind-the-scenes supporter to her husband's parenting when they don't.
You can tell from a quick glance at my blog bio that I'm a stepmother -- but I almost never write about it. For me, that changed everything. You and your husband need to be each other's refuge, particularly when you're having issues with your children or stepchildren. Maybe you even think your husband is to blame, because he always seems to take their side. Be prepared to shop around until you find someone you and your husband are both comfortable with.
Don't let it get you down. But then puberty happened. A counselor can be wonderful at helping you do this. I wish I had heard it a lot sooner, because I spent years trying to do a whole lot of fixing. It will teach them to do the same some day.
Follow Lindsay on her Facebook page. And I had two small children of my own. It wasn't until a few years ago that I confided my feelings of failure to a counselor, who promptly informed me that what my family and I were experiencing was actually very, very common. What a waste of energy. I went into the first session thinking I was a horrible stepmom and that our problems raising the girls were unique to us and insurmountable, and do you know what the counselor told us? Stepmom, let's just get something straight right now. You will come across other stepmoms who can't stop raving about how wonderful their relationships are with their stepchildren. "They tell me ALL their secrets! " You can't change everyone else, but you can change yourself.
"They told me they think of me as their REAL MOM! " Please don't do what I did and spend years convincing yourself that something is very wrong with you because you seem to screw everything up. Remember number one? If you've got to let it out, limit your thoughts to a very close, trusted friend, or even better, tell it to your counselor or therapist. "You guys are doing great! Work on that, and hope that your efforts inspire others in your family to try harder, too.
"They convinced the city to hold a parade in my honor! " Image via Zaman Babu/Flickr Creative Commons.
As you drive around dark corners, standard older-model headlights aren't the best at illuminating the road ahead. They can also be required by Georgia bicycle laws to wear helmets on highways for highway safety and on sidewalks unless a local ordinance suggests otherwise. One-third of all bicyclists seen for injuries in the emergency room are diagnosed with head injuries. What are the Exceptions to Georgia's Bicycle Helmet Law? You should get a jacket with a waterproof shell and enough ventilation. Your case will be dismissed. An insurer could justify paying you less by arguing that your injuries would not have been as severe had you been wearing a helmet. If you require physical therapy, chiropractic therapy, prescription medicine, and even transportation, these will be covered in your compensation. Failing to wear a helmet while operating or riding on a motorcycle in Georgia comes with some pretty stiff consequences, so motorcyclists should think twice before ignoring this law. Can You Be Deemed Negligent for Not Wearing a Bicycle Helmet? Whatever the percentage is, this amount will be deducted from your total damages. Motorcycle-specific apparel may feature padding made of Kevlar, premium leather, and plastic. Lastly, helmets with built-in speakers are only permissible for communication purposes. Are Helmets Mandatory In Georgia?
Preparing Your Motorcycle. Motorcycle Accident Statistics. Riding a motorcycle in a beautiful area like Thomson, Georgia, can be an enjoyable way to get from Point A to Point B. Section 40-6-315 of the Georgia statutes states: "No person shall operate or ride upon a motorcycle unless he or she is wearing protective headgear which complies with standards established by the commissioner of public safety". Internal bleeding takes a long time to heal and can also put you at risk of infection. Bicyclists have very little protection from the force of a vehicle slamming into them. Continue reading to learn more about bike and bicycle helmet laws in Georgia and how wearing headgear can save you from severe head injuries.
You see it all the time in states without restrictive helmet laws. Nearly 200 of those resulted in fatalities. However, it is possible for a parent to be charged with a misdemeanor for failing to equip their child with an appropriate bicycle helmet. This is true throughout all areas of the state. They cannot be used for listening to music or other forms of entertainment. This means that, as long as you're less than 50% at fault, you can still collect damages for your motorcycle accident. If a cyclist decides to sue a motorist to receive compensation for injuries, both parties will have the opportunity to make their case to the jury. There is a very good reason Georgia requires bikers to wear helmets—they have been proven to save lives and reduce the chance of injury. The law does not allow any person under the age of 16 to be fined or imprisoned for not wearing a helmet. The problem is, the defendant is not going to want to pay you damages.
In total, from 2000 to 2006, there were 774 motorcycle accident fatalities and 15, 292 injuries. Is It Illegal to Ride a Bicycle on the Sidewalk In Georgia? I hope you will truly consider what i have proposed and we can get legislature moving in the correct this unjust law and allow all bikers to once again have the freedom they wish. Minors (age 15 or less) are required to wear bicycle helmets on all bike paths and bike lanes in the state. Do Motorcyclists Have to Wear Helmets in Georgia? Doing so also means that you don't have to worry about facing fines, jail time or community service. They've handled dozens of cases just like yours. Majority of fatalities in Georgia have happened in the bigger Atlanta cities. According to this rule, when you are found to have a shared fault in an accident, your compensation is reduced to your fault in that accident. In the state of Georgia, the law of comparative negligence applies to your settlement claim. How to find affordable car and motorcycle insurance. Bowel and renal contusions.
Some wear them and some do not. According to Georgia's bicycle laws, a person under the age of 16 cannot be fined or imprisoned for not wearing protective headgear or a bicycle helmet. Is It Illegal to Ride a Motorcycle Without a Helmet In Georgia? Whether you are the operator or the passenger, wearing a helmet drastically reduces your risk of injury or death. You May Be Found to Be Partially at Fault. However, it also means your claim will be reduced by your percentage of fault.
If the insurance company does not offer an appropriate amount, your Peachtree City bicycle accident lawyer can file a personal injury claim to increase your odds of receiving the correct amount of damages for your injury. You can experience first, second, or third-degree burns. The National Safety Council (NSC) says that one-third of non-fatal bicyclist injuries are head injuries and that a majority of the 80, 000 cycling-related head injuries treated in hospitals each year are brain injuries.
Not wearing a helmet can also seriously jeopardize your chances of recovering proper compensation if you take legal action. Electronic Tire Pressure Monitors. The headgear should not have anything extending beyond an inch of its shell and should be U. S. Department of Transportation (DOT) approved. For example, in personal injury lawsuits involving bicycle accidents, motor vehicle operators can try to shift the blame on the victim to fend off paying for the damages. These gloves can also help absorb the force of the fall. Some gloves have sliders that protect your palms if you slide down the road. Spring is upon us and more and more people are taking their motorcycles for a weekend ride. You can suffer from minor backache and radiating pain because of the spinal cord injury, or paralysis due to severed spinal nerves. Northeast Georgia is a popular ride for many motorcyclists especially Helen and Dahlonega, Georgia.